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  2. John Mulaney is a comedian and writer who is known for his witty and observational humor. Here are some of his quotes12:
    • “Why do people shush animals? They just go ‘Shhh, hey, shhh.’ They’ve never spoken.”
    • “I have a lot of stories about being a kid because it was the last time I was interesting.”
    • “I never knew you were supposed to push off of your feet when you walked. And I tried it, and I walked much faster.”
    • “Things don’t exist until they exist.”
    • “I don’t look older, I just look worse.”
    • “It’s like there’s a horse loose in a hospital.”
    • “13-year olds are the meanest people in the world.”
    • “It’s 100% easier not to do things than to do them.”
    Learn more:

    Hilarious John Mulaney Quotes and Best Stories “Why do people shush animals? They just go ‘Shhh, hey, shhh.’ They’ve never spoken.” “I have a lot of stories about being a kid because it was the last time I was interesting.” “I never knew you were supposed to push off of your feet when you walked. And I tried it, and I walked much faster.”

    alterables.com/articles/john-mulaney-quotes/

    John Mulaney Quotes

    • “Things don’t exist until they exist.” – John Mulaney
    • “You know comedy once you’re doing it.” – John Mulaney
    • “I don’t look older, I just look worse.” ...
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  3. People also ask
    What are the best John Mulaney quotes & jokes?Clearly incredibly talented and hilarious, here are some of the best John Mulaney quotes and jokes. 1. "In terms of like, instant relief, canceling plans is like heroin." 2. "I had a producer tell me I couldn't use the word midget because it was 'worse than the n-word.' First off...no, it's not.
    How many John Mulaney quotes are there?Here are 26 John Mulaney quotes that will instantly improve your day. stand-up comedian, actor, writer and producer. Best known for his work at since 2008. boy when he realized that he wanted to go into show business. While in junior a skit. After graduation, he moved to New York to pursue his dream of becoming a comedian.
    How old is Mulaney when he joked about a horse?The combination of his dad's intensity, his mom's diversion, and the fact that Mulaney was only a 6 year old makes this joke a heavy hitter, delivered all in just one minute. Perhaps the most relevant/current of Mulaney's jokes is the scenario of a horse being loose in a hospital.
    How does John Mulaney influence people?John Mulaney has the ability to influence people with hiswitty lines. If you want to motivate yourself, check out some of the best John Mulaney quotes about life below. His humor will undoubtedly improve your attitude, and his talent is unrivalled. Enjoy! I’m a very lucky person.
     
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    WEBBest John Mulaney Quotes. 1. “It’s 100% easier not to do things than to do them.” 2. “Do you want a salad or fries? That’s like asking, ‘Do you want to go for a jog or freebase cocaine?’” 3. “I always thought that quicksand …

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    WEBSep 16, 2021 · “Cancelling plans is like h***in, it is an amazing feeling.” John Mulaney, Cancelling Plans is like Heroin. “I don’t know what it’s like moments before you get killed by a hitman, but I’m sure it’s not unlike …

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